The escape and return of love?

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I am 34 year age, number of years is not too much to give up hope on a new happiness, but during more than a dozen years, my life as a film full of wild and awkward suffering, tears and love.

Now think again he never is the main character in her life, but he is the main source of life for me, and maybe because of this, the pain in my heart leaving Mercy again many times further than others.

I met you when just over 20 years with wild love fool in the final years of sitting on the University Lecture Hall. I still remember that day like feeling frightened and nervous when I was pregnant with her lover.

Certainly at the time I also love panic no less, he is a new student guy off the field, the more I age 1. When calm again after the song wind early life, I always told myself like to think about the running of the first responsible for abortion are growing in my belly.

I was a man abandoned because Miss pregnant, and being a man left because could not have children.

But that is the story of very long after that, and then, when I was leaving again with pain, confusion and ensuing collapse, I felt did not live on the this life anymore. I dare not tell my mother or any relatives in the family.

Only best friend girlfriend on the side, Pimp me into the hospital to remove the fetus is growing. In the meantime, major I have met who I was hanging onto in order to get the attention, care, pass the first shock.

He is a doctor in the hospital, the clinic directly for me. That day, a hospital patient makes the Eastern doctors are all turned on and try your best to be for everyone. You own, don't understand why right from the first glance, I was feeling absolutely considerate warmth.

Could do at the time I too needed a place to lean. I care and worry for me, let me wipe the tears of great new girl lock stumble after the first love. And I become the outside life.

Interest, but not excessive, so I understand the limitations in our relationship, he has become a person I look up to the Center of the fun of life. And above all, he is a doctor-Dr. success with a family.

He became the source of motivation in life at the time, rather than can ever be a person I can keep in my heart, though I also handed him the best feelings.

As time went by, I graduated and started working. After the hard time to remove completely the nightmare every night, I am very self contained his relationships with other people. During a few years later, I have only you as the person you mate.

Even when there is a decent man, gentle intended seriously to me, I also dare not embrace emotionally. As the bird scared of the curved shoots, I let out the relationship with the people in love with herself.

Sometimes I wonder maybe because next to him and I had my trust with you is too big? You motivate me to embrace happiness when it comes to himself. And above all, I feel I can't keep relying on you to live like that anymore.

The man, who became my husband later. It seems that my tragedy stems from the too-gentle lead to effeminate of the men appeared in his life.

I took my husband to be near 1, then pregnant, but when abortion in less than 2 months I did not keep it. So, my next pregnancy several times were ran and must drink a hormone therapy drugs in the body.

Sadness in the hearts and the fatigue of the body makes my life has added these squabbles. And what's worse, my husband is not patient enough and cannot withstand the pressure of the job occurs.

My husband's mother was the capital. She longed to have I followed Tong Road and after a few years daughter can not have children, she urged her son to go get married. My husband follows too many tired of life, I do divorce petition and send it to me.

Do not hesitate, I signed the petition, because the pride and misery. After signing into the divorce, I completely collapse.

I was a man abandoned because Miss pregnant, and being a man left because could not have children. Extreme pain, I take a vốc drug, drink and lie down. I want to get rid of the nightmare again.

But I can't go to heaven, or hell even also be, I just want to escape from real life is too harsh. I open up eyes and dimly saw him in the side.

He was the ghost felt something and call to her girlfriend to find me at the time, promptly put me into the hospital before everything too late.

I opened my eyes and saw him sitting by the wake, gripped my hand and the tears fell Lü BU new. A man crying because I, as pity for my destiny or because of something else?

See I woke, he rushed to hide his water-filled eyes and blame me why such a foolish Act. The day after that, he was always at my side, I've ever cared for meals, sleep. I also heard the couple split after you get married for some time.

He only said that he never felt happy in my marriage because my parents arranged for a dozen years. I rekindled a ray of hope, pinch about a very vague feelings that I also do not dare to think about.

Once again he is the shoulder I lean after the turbulent. But this time is very different, I am no longer a young surveyor entered my life, you are no longer in a position far away vợi. Me and you together than ever.

He proactively took my hand, warm hands. But that is only the fist rush, I fear that there is something behind the rush. And just as I fear our emotions, such as clearer, more realistic then you start away from me.

Even for me, I hold the attachment citrus stem flee my feelings. I'm stunned because he reported that Foreign Affairs will forward some time to pursue a topic being studied. The run made me crazy and went wild.

I screamed that he even cowardice and total ass than the men who betray me, because you know your position is still larger than many times the man in my life. Despite I screamed, he still arrange their work and fled far away.

In his email sent on right then, you told me the truth perhaps I never wanted to believe. In fact he was the first love of my mother.

When two people and together build the ambitious dream about happiness, the parents do not agree I retrieved my mother that you have to get a friend's child to "subject posted runner-up for".

It does not go beyond the decision of his parents, he had to leave my mother and his marriage was never happy. Throughout his life he always felt there was an error with my mother. That day my mother was very distressed, decline and retrieved my father, a classmate during college.

When Alive, the parents have a lot of melancholy in eyes. I always see that every time she hugged me and looked away from the tattoo on a Sun. My mother died young because of depression not through out. The day after, I find about the graves of my mother and think a lot.

After escaping the vicious pain of the heart, reason I understand that can stuff his feelings for me not to love. But if it is love, certainly no easy escape from the haunted by the past and dreams of the day before.

I will wait for the time to do the trail in the heart and the serenity will look to me, and to you as a peaceful day after thunderstorms and Hurricane tan fades.=