Rest assured that, even if it's your first dive, chances are you'll be fine β everyone starts somewhere!
But we want to make sure you're more than fine, because life's too short for oral that's just meh.
After all, if you're gonna go down, you should do it right.
Here's what you need to know about the giving and getting of oral sex, plus all of the fun and even practical stuff in between.
Before getting down to nitty, let's talk about the gritty.
Forget what you heard from Clinton or anyone else about what sex is and isn't. Penis-in-vagina sex is not the be-all-end-all of sex. Oral sex can be just as pleasurable β if not more so β than penetrative sex.
Vulvas and penises come in all shapes and sizes, so try not to spend any time worrying about how yours compares to someone else's.
Vulvas rarely look like a perfectly juicy peach, and penises aren't usually eggplant emoji-big or smooth.
Scrub all you want, but you'll still have some odor down there. It's called your natural odor, and it's fine.
That said, freshening up before oral sex is just the nice thing to do.
To keep things fresh:
You know whose genital juice tastes like cookies and cream? No one's! We all have a taste down there.
As long as you're healthy and on top of your hygiene, you should taste fine.
If you're still worried about funky spunk, tweaking what you eat may improve the taste of your juice.
Avoid garlic, onions, asparagus, and cabbage, which reportedly make for a less-than-pleasant flavor.
To sweeten your sauce, try eating:
There's no risk of pregnancy from oral sex, but there is a very real risk of oral STIs.
Any skin-to-skin contact with the genitals can spread STIs. The same goes for contact with vaginal, penile, or anal secretions.
There's also some risk of transmitting an STI to the fetus if you have oral sex during pregnancy.
STIs that can be transmitted through oral sex include:
Some oral STIs don't cause any symptoms, but if they do they may include:
If you're sexually active, you probably know that regular STI screening is important.
But did you know that you should be getting regular oral exams, too?
Your dentist can inspect your mouth to check for sores, lumps, or other abnormalities that could be a sign of an STI.
Oral exams are also used to check for signs of oral cancer. Certain strains of HPV can cause oral cancer.
You should see your doctor or dentist for at least one screening a year.
See your provider right away if you're experiencing unusual oral symptoms or suspect that you've been exposed to an STI.
Do you really flick the clit? You can! Lightly flicking the clit with your tongue can be a nice way to mix things up and build pleasure. Think soft puppy tongue licking an ice cream cone β not woodpecker destroying a tree.
Should you insert your tongue or keep things penetration-free? That's up to the person you're going down on. Some people find the mere idea of being tongued hot AF, but fewer nerve endings in the opening means less sensation. If they like it then go to town.
What if they're on their period or pregnant? If they consent and you're cool with it, too, then go for it. Things can get messy, so focusing on the clit is probably the better way to go. Know that blood can have an odor and a metallic taste. A dental dam can help if you're squeamish.
Try this:
With a little determination and imagination, you can turn pretty much any penetrative sex position into an oral sex position.
But to save you the neck cramps, we recommend these oral-friendly positions:
The best barrier method you can use when giving oral to someone with a vulva is a dental dam. This is a thin latex barrier that you place over the vulva.
You can order dental dams online or use a condom to create an alternative.
Do a quick wash up before and after oral sex with soap and water or gentle wipes and you're both good to go.
What should you do if they're uncircumcised? There's not much difference in technique as far as circumcised vs. uncircumcised. If you start off with a hand job, let the foreskin move up and down with your hand. When you're ready to get licky with it, gently pull the foreskin downward to expose the head.
Do you have to deep throat? Nope, not unless you want to. Not going deep isn't going to make or break an oral sesh. You can totally fake it by placing the tip of your tongue on the roof of your mouth and sucking as much as you'd like without an unexpected gag.
Should you spit, swallow, or keep ejaculate out of the mouth entirely? That's something to discuss with your partner beforehand, but you don't ever have to do anything you don't want to do. If it's a visual turn on for your partner, having them finish on your closed lips or chin β or wherever you're comfortable with β should do the trick.
Give these moves a try:
Again, with some imagination you can get your blow on in just about any position. Try giving these a go:
We've got two words for you: flavored condoms. Seriously, if you're going for the safe blow job, flavored condoms reduce your risk for STIs while giving you something tasty to suck on.
As for cleanup, a shower before and a wipe up after does the trick.
Aren't you going to get poop in your mouth? We aren't gonna lie β it's a possibility. Washing with a soft cloth and soap and water is usually enough to get rid of the traces of feces that linger in the anus.
What do you do if there's hair back there? No biggy. Just go with it, unless they want their bum shaved, but that's a hole β er, whole β other article.
Should you insert your tongue or keep things penetration-free? It's all about your comfort level. You absolutely shouldn't stick your tongue anywhere that you don't want to. If they're open to it, fingers and butt plugs can do the penetrating for you.
Try these start-to-finish moves:
Doggy style is a rimming fave. It gives you equal control over the pressure and movement to find what works best for both of you.
To do this, have them get on all fours while you kneel behind. They can rest their head on a pillow and lift or lower their bottom to meet your mouth.
Dental dams, tongue condoms, or a regular condom used as a dam will all work for safe rimming. Trimmed nails and clean hands are also important if you're going to use your fingers in or around the anus.
A thorough cleaning of the area in the bath or shower using gentle soap and water is sufficient, but the recipient can also use an enema if they want to.
Once you're done, you can use an oral rinse or brush your teeth if you'd like. Washing your hands and face are probably a good idea, too.
Now that you've got the moves, here's some final advice. Use these tips to make oral sex everything.
Asking questions is key for making any kind of sex the best it can be. Be sure to ask for their clear consent before getting started.
Asking what turns them on isn't only helpful, but can also act as foreplay. Questions during oral are cool, too, so don't be afraid to ask if something feels good while you're doing it.
It's hot and kinda moist, so of course it's going to feel ah-mazing on their skin. Linger an inch above their skin and let your hot breath tease them into a frenzy.
Let them hear how much you're enjoying what you're doing. Moans, spitting, and slurping β it's all good!
Eye contact while you're going down is sexy AF. It's also a great way to gauge your partner's reactions to your moves so you know what's working and what isn't.
Don't be shy with those hands! Use them to spread the labia for better access to all the nooks and crannies, or to work the shaft like a pro while swirling your tongue around their head.
Use your mouth, hands, or sex toys to explore their other erogenous zones during oral play to take it to another orgasmic level.
Sure, your mouth is plenty juicy, but lube is fun for everyone! Flavored lubes can make oral sex tasty and can make hand action or toy play even better.
Edging, also called orgasm control, is the ultimate tease and the way to toe-curling orgasms. You work your magic to bring them to the edge of climax and then stop for about 30 seconds before starting up the stimulation again.
Oral sex can be as fun for the giver as it is for the receiver if you really get into it. In other words, check your inhibitions at the door, and don't be afraid to get messy. Bon appΓ©tit!